Here We Go Again

I’m pregnant . . . and terrified.

Terrified the baby will die again.

Terrified every time I use the restroom I will see blood.

Terrified to have hope.

I am truly grateful that it was so easy for me to get pregnant again.  I absolutely do not take fertility for granted.  I know each month a couple tries to conceives and “fails” only adds stress and heartache to the situation.  All I can say is after all we went through last year maybe we do deserve to have this part of pregnancy go smoothly.  We have a long, stressful road ahead of us.  If this baby has the same birth defect as Haley did we will not know until around week 23, well into second trimester.  There is no test we can do.

Now it is just a waiting game.  Wish us luck, we’ll take all the prayers we can get.

(Originally published July 17th, 2016)

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